Thomas the Doubter

"The Incredulity of St. Thomas" by Caravaggio

housed in the Sanssouci, Potsdam, Germany

Today I read the story of “Doubting Thomas.”

I’m sure you know this one: Thomas was not with the other disciples when Jesus appears to them after the Resurrection and so he doesn’t believe Jesus has actually risen. He announces that he will not in fact believe it until he has seen and touched Jesus for himself. Then Jesus Himself does appear and invites Thomas to inspect Him, after which Thomas is humbled and believes in Jesus.

The story ends with a blessing on those who have not seen and yet believe, obviously referring to future Christians.

This passage is usually interpreted as putting poor Thomas in a bad light. Even the name “Doubting Thomas” seems like an insult. In fact, author Dan Brown goes so far as to cast this story as a bit of anti-Thomas propaganda in the book The DaVinci Code, which is going a bit far I think.

Still, you can imagine all the disciples standing about smugly as Jesus shows Himself to Thomas, nodding to each other and saying, “See! WE TOLD you we saw Him!” Conveniently forgetting that they too had required the proof of their own eyes in order to believe, the disciples would have been reproving Thomas for his lack of faith.

But today I saw the story a little differently. Let’s read it first:

John 20:24-29

24 Now Thomas (also known as Didymus),one of the Twelve,

was not with the disciples when Jesus came.

25 So the other disciples told him, “We have seen the Lord!” 

But he said to them, “Unless I see the nail marks

in His hands and put my finger where the nails were,

and put my hand into His side, I will not believe.”

26 A week later his disciples were in the house again,

and Thomas was with them. Though the doors were locked,

Jesus came and stood among them and said,

“Peace be with you!” 27 Then He said to Thomas,

“Put your finger here; see My hands.

Reach out your hand and put it into my side.

Stop doubting and believe.”

28 Thomas said to Him, “My Lord and my God!”

29 Then Jesus told him, “Because you have seen Me,

you have believed; blessed are those who have not seen

and yet have believed.”

One thing that struck me here was the fact that Jesus made a special trip just to appear to Thomas. He had already completed His work on earth. He had appeared to several disciples after the Resurrection. He could have gone ahead and trundled off to Heaven, but He came to see Thomas instead.

Did He do this in order to rebuke Thomas for his lack of faith? Or in order to reassure him?

To me His words here seem gentle and comforting. He offers no recriminations; He only instructs Thomas to “stop doubting and believe.” He doesn’t even throw in an “O ye of little faith!”

In His compassion, He comes to see Thomas and Thomas alone, to let a beloved disciple that He was indeed alive, and to shore up the crumbing faith of one He cared for.

In this light, I find the story encouraging. Jesus is shown here as the One who comes to us to reassure us. As the Psalmist says in chapter 103,verses 13-14:

“As a father has compassion on his children,
so the LORD has compassion on those who fear Him;
for He knows how we are formed,
He remembers that we are dust.”

Instead of sitting up in Heaven waiting to bop us on the head and rebuke us for our failings, the Lord has compassion on us, and wants to help us instead.

Even those of us who are “Doubting Thomases!”

There's No Gold Star Award For Mommy

Motherhood is the original thankless job.
(I know they say it’s the second-oldest profession, but surely there was SOME gratitude involved for the first!)

Since the first child was born, mothers have been pouring all their mental, emotional and material resources into their babies and receiving very little in return.

I know, we receive their love and sweet little smiles. Sometimes.

But we also receive their tantrums. And their screams. And, well, their poop.

And then they get bigger, which is a whole new problem.

That’s the way it has to be, right?

After all, one day our kids will have their own children who will turn around to do the same thing to them.

(Unless they’re boys. But that’s another story.)

So we all understand that this is way it has to be when you’re raising children.

But I tell you, it’s tough when you’re going through it.

As author Jo Anne Miller said, “The work of motherhood is unseen, intangible, unrewarded and unending.”

You said it, sister!

Just trying to write this short essay I’ve been interrupted a good fifteen times by my own demanding toddlers.

Would it be so hard for them to just say a little thank-you in return?

(Yes. I know. They’re TODDLERS. I’m dreaming here.)

But the truth is, I’m not supposed to even be looking for anything in return for my efforts as a mother OR as a Christian.

Colossians 3:23-24

23 Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for human masters, 24 since you know that you will receive an inheritance from the Lord as a reward. It is the Lord Christ you are serving.

Matt 6:1-4

1 “Be careful not to practice your righteousness in front of others to be seen by them. If you do, you will have no reward from your Father in heaven.

2 “So when you give to the needy, do not announce it with trumpets, as the hypocrites do in the synagogues and on the streets, to be honored by others. Truly I tell you, they have received their reward in full. 3 But when you give to the needy, do not let your left hand know what your right hand is doing, 4 so that your giving may be in secret. Then your Father, who sees what is done in secret, will reward you.

Hmmm. So it looks like I’ve had the wrong idea all along here. We’re not supposed to be working for any rewards, even gratitude. We do it all as unto the Lord, in an attitude of thankfulness for all He's given US.

After all, aren't WE the original thankless children?


above image from amazon.com

Who Controls the Future? Not Me!

"Corn Fields and Poppies" by Vincent Van Gogh, Israel Museum, Jerusalem

Here are some thoughts I wrote a while ago on a pair of Scriptures:

Mark 4:26-29
Jesus also said, "This is what the kingdom of God is like. A man scatters seed on the ground. Night and day, whether he sleeps or gets up, the seed sprouts and grows, though he does not know how. All by itself the soil produces grain—first the stalk, then the head, then the full kernel in the head. As soon as the grain is ripe, he puts the sickle to it, because the harvest has come."

I Corinthians 3:6-9
I (Paul) planted the seed, Apollos watered it, but God made it grow. So neither he who plants nor he who waters is anything, but only God, who makes things grow. The man who plants and the man who waters have one purpose, and each will be rewarded according to his own labor. For we are God's fellow workers; you are God's field, God's building.

Those are pretty cool when read together, don’t you think?

This is very timely for me right now: I’ve been thinking a lot about What Is My Purpose Here On Earth and all that. Maybe it’s a midlife crisis thing or something; I’m coming up on my 40th birthday soon. (If you see me buying a red sports car, stop me! Ha ha)

But, the thing is, much of what I do every day as a mother seems absolutely pointless. I mean, I wash clothes, and they get dirty again. I feed people, and they get hungry again. I clean the house, and it gets messed up again. It’s frustrating. Maybe you know what I’m talking about. At the end of the day, I look back and ask, “What have I accomplished today?” Rarely can I hold up some sort of finished product and say, “THIS! I completed this thing here!”

And sometimes it seems like the best thing I can say at the end of the day is, “The children are all still alive! I have sustained these five lives for one more day!” And maybe that IS enough. But I always feel like I’m falling short, that I’m not doing a good enough job as a mother. Especially when one or the other of them does something that makes me say, “What have I done WRONG that my child would ACT this way!” (Which is pretty much every day when there are so many of them. At least they take turns.) I worry about their futures, about what kind of people they will become, and what they’ll have to tell their therapists about me when they grow up.

Anyways, back to the Bible. What this Scripture is saying to me is, Just do YOUR job, and leave the finished product to God. As human beings, we want to control so many things that are really up to God. The truth is, we can’t even make a seed grow! We can do our part, planting and watering and all that, but ultimately, the result is in God‘s hands. HE must grow the seed. He controls the future, and we don’t.

And so what I have to do is trust God, and keep doing what He has set in front of me to do. And that’s both the easiest and the hardest thing about life!